Snappy – but not a Klaptrap in sight 🙁
RBS – This game looks old.
ND – It is old.
RBS – Then why are we playing it?
ND –Because its a remake of an absolute gaming staple, and as my heir you will experience it. Look, it has multiplayer, we can play together.
Jumps on the first enemy. First enemy dies. No double bounce. Diddy loses a heart as a result.
ND- SCREAMING – what happened to double bounce? WHAT HAPPENED TO DOUBLE BOUNCE?
RBS – (a Potter head)
And herein lies the biggest problem of Donkey Kong Country Returns HD (from here on out DKCRHD). The Wii original was a certified classic. A reimagining of an iconic character’s grandest adventure (Donkey Kong Country 1-3 on SNES forever hold God-tier status. If you’ve never played them, head on over to NSO and remedy that as soon as you’ve finished here…). With the Switch era winding down and, presumably, all the big, exciting new game announcements being saved for Nintendo Switch 2, DKCRHD felt like a no-brainer. Unfortunately, it feels more like a Cobain-er. Because it shot itself.
In the foot…
B A N A N A S
The premise is what you’d expect. This is your tried-and-tested, tale-as-old-as-time, um, tale about a monkey (not a donkey) having his hoard of precious bananas stolen by a tribe of floating shaman. Shaman who employ the ancient art of hypnosis to enslave all of the animals in the jungle, to do their bidding, no less. Now, I’m not too sure if Rare owns the IP to the Klaptraps, and that’s why we never see ol’ King K. Rool anymore, but if they do it’s just another example of how they’re really not utilising their assets over at the good ship Xbox. Saying that every Xbox game will be playable on your smart washing machine by the time they release a new Rare game, so…
But, I digress.
It’s up to our titular protagonist and his minuscule nephew (not sure if he’s a nephew in the way Snoop Dogg refers to artists he’s colabbing with or an actual child of Cranky’s brother or sister. It’s probably best not to think too much about it), Diddy, to embark on an epic adventure across the island, traversing precarious platforms and blasting their way from barrel to barrel, vine to minecart and even enlisting the help of Rambi the rhinoceros along the way too. Take that, spike pits!
As you simultaneously circumnavigate and scale the island, you’ll explore varied locales, ranging from the deep jungle home of DK to areas like the forest, which house an entirely different – but no less important selection of conifers than the jungles does. There are also so delightfully eclectic environments which aren’t defined by their trees.
In each level, you aim to collect jigsaw pieces and the letters K O N G. Puzzle pieces can be collected upon a whim, whereas K O N G must be collected in a single run. Completing KONG in every level in an area unlocks a delectable daredevil level that will test your platforming skills to the max. Whereas regular stages utilise checkpoints throughout, these temples are a one-and-done deal. Should you fall or deplete your hearts, it’s back to the start, you cheeky monkey.
The three Ps, lest we forget: Platforming. Perfection. Primeape?
DKCRHD is a very competent platforming experience. It’s incredibly well-designed, and the difficulty spike means you’ll be challenged. For the love of Chunky Kong, you’ll be challenged. But it’s such a rewarding moment when you finally complete a level, jigsaw and KONG complete. There’s a particularly heinous jetpack-barrel level early in the game that sees you chased by what I can only assume is the King of all bats. It’s a pretty straightforward run, once you learn its attack pattern, but plotting a course to grab all the collectables while you’re there is another story altogether.
Backwards boatman
Inherently, DKCRHD is a very good game but there a few little niggles that I take grievance with.
The aforementioned lack of double-bounce seems like an extreme oversight, and perhaps a lack of understanding of the source material from the team who worked on the port – Forever Entertainment. It also begs the question; was this a conscious decision or did this really get through QA? Maybe I should be a QA tester for Nintendo. Certainly food for thought.
Secondly, the load times are excruciating. I understand that the Switch is fast approaching its eighth birthday, however, I find the performance somewhat perplexing. I can jump from an island in the sky, past the vibrant and populated land of Hyrule and deep down into the depths below in one seamless transition – in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom – for example, but have to wait for what seems an eternity to load a 2D platformer level.
The lack of a mode akin to Funky Kong and his magical dry-land surfboard from Tropical Freeze is a shame. Prior to its release, I’d talked this title up so much to my 7yo, and explained that even if she didn’t click with the intricacies of the game immediately, she’d be able to activate Funky mode and still enjoy it, regardless. Alas, Super-sonic-DK-white-hot mode just isn’t the same as you simply watch an AI DK complete the level for you. Suffice it to say, the difficulty spike made my daughter lose interest in DKCRHD quite quickly, which is a real shame, and the reason why yours truly took point on this review.
Also included are the exclusive levels from the 3DS version, but they feel odd and out of place and were presumably made with stereoscopic 3D in mind. They’re not bad by any stretch, but they’re not great, or memorable either. But hey, better to have them than to see them lost and forgotten.
In the absence of the DK Rap, I choose excellence…
One thing that can’t be denied is the sheer brilliance of the music of DKCRHD. The soundtrack slaps harder than a simian whose hoard of potassium supplements has been stolen, and he ain’t messing about. I’m talking – disgruntled husband who can’t take a joke, at glitzy celebrity do, levels of going HAM!
Kenji Yamamoto – a Metroid Prime alum – led the team and took no prisoners. He inimitably and lovingly (and apparently at the request of Miyamoto-San) recomposed the classic David Wise compositions to offer players a familiar comfort when playing through the game. It works. And, if you’re new to the series you’ll be bopping your noggin in no time. Every audible decibel on offer is an absolute bangarang of a tune, a tip-top barrage of audio delights for your ear drums. Oh, the drums. So many drums!
Conclusion
DKCRHD is an odd one. At its core – and paying respect to the Wii original – it’s an absolute blinder of a game. But on the Nintendo Switch, it feels a little amateurish in places, under-optimised and somewhat unloved. There’s still a lot of enjoyment to be had here if you have the patience. But as an end-of-life title, you hope that a little more care and polish was put into a port such as this. With Tropical Freeze also available on the console, it’s hard not to recommend picking that up over this. The lack of QoL and accessibility options makes DKCRHD feel a little basic and lacking, in comparison.
For die-hard Donkey Kong fans though, this is still an absolute treasure trove of purist platforming that will engage and delight. With a bit more care paid to the porting duties, Q&A, and accessibility options, DKCRHD could have been a slam dunk. Instead, it feels like a banana split. Here’s to hoping that Nintendo Switch 2 will bring us an all-new DK experience.
Hold on, football’s kicking off. Semi-final. Let’s go. It’s on like…
Wait. How does that saying go?
Rainbow Blossom Sunshine